My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
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Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
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These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.