epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
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