i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
