i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
They are going to name an STD after you.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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