I murdered the dance floor call the cops
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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