there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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