You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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