Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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