drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?