cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
someone owes me an orgasm
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
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