You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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