i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize