Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
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They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
how drunk are you?
Several
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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