too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize