you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
