after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
