Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.