That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
