He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
