My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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