Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Randomize