I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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