Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.