gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize