I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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