The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
No he was cute and I said yes!
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right