So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?