i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize