And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say