At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize