So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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