smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
if only i could text you this smell
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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