this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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