That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Why are your pants in the freezer?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
