the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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