If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize