I want to stick my p in your. b.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
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