I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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