i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize