so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
