seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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