There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
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