I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
When did angry sex become our thing?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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