Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Randomize
