I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
