dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
