Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
