That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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