He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
