I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
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I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
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I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
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